Young Dublin Climate Activist Comes to a Deadly Realisation.

Niamh suddenly disappears into the 4th dimension when asked a simple question.

It’s outside of the Custom House in Dublin. Yet another global warming march is taking place. 10,000 students are marching for their future. Without a doubt, these individuals are completely devout to their cause. They really practise what they preach. It’s clear in fact, that from trying talking to a few guys and girls today that these crusaders have nothing but dedication for the greater good.

For instance, just outside of the main congregation of protesters we managed to speak to Niamh, a 16-year-old 5th year. When asked what she thinks of the current climate situation, Niamh expertly responds with a cleverly and coherently constructed response. Or so we thought at the start…

Niamh: “Yeah, erm, I mean like the world is just about hotter than Leonardo di Caprio at the moment. I think that everyone here are doing their best to combat this crisis. It’s going to heavily influence our future. I believe that the main issue is carbon emissions.”

Good start. Every reasonable person assumes she’s willing to lead by example, right? I mean she’s young, ambitious and a visionary, just like all those other climate crusaders, right? Please?

Interviewer: “Oh right great, so does this mean that you won’t fly on holidays abroad this summer to Portugal and release 900kg of carbon emissions to get there and back?”

Niamh’s face starts to shrivel.

And, as predicted, under such harsh facts had spontaneously combusted. Her brain short-circuited, creating a micro-blackhole; which transported her body, mind and soul into the 4th dimension by means of quantum self-absorption. Condolences to her beloved family.


This climate crisis is very, very real. And it doesn’t take my explanation, well, because it has just about every person with at least their head screwed on behind the movement to mitigate the issues we’re facing. However, many can agree that in fact there’s a worrying amount of hypocrisy surrounding the issue, and we’re all the main culprits to be honest. However, without a doubt these ‘protests’ are microcosms of how all of our mindsets really work. We still go abroad, spend hours in our carbon tin boxes in traffic and buy cheap, mass produced clothes which were transported halfway across the globe to Pennys store in Dundrum. Half of the students there today aren’t remotely prepared to make these changes. And myself included, being a young student, I think that activism without true activism is devoid of moral integrity and is completely fruitless.

Next climate aware article will be from my Villa in the Algarve. 



Author: Irish Daily Complainer

The non serious tabloid.

2 thoughts on “Young Dublin Climate Activist Comes to a Deadly Realisation.”

  1. Not untrue but unfortunately it’s huge carbon emitters such as big corporations that are the main problem, not normal people. It’s not enough anymore for people to just make their own changes as isn’t an effective way of combatting the climate crisis.


    1. Hey Emily. Hope you enjoyed the article. I agree with your points. We need to see that in fact, the corporations wouldn’t exist without the consumers. That’s why I’ve made this comedic passage…to tell people that they do in fact have the power. Without us, these ‘corporations’ wouldn’t exist because there’d be no demand for such products and services.


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